I don’t know why but your love was a lie.

I cherish the memories deep in my heart. I still have those pics and videos and I see your pics or ours or I see those videos we created out of no where . when we deeply in love. those moments we shared together , those times when we cooked together. those days we lived together. we drove around and we saw a movie in Russian . I remember how we went to this cinema hall somewhere in the city center and I knew that it will be dubbed in Russian but I was ok with it coz language was a never a border to me.

To me love sees no boundaries . just like music knows no language . I never came to you seeing I will be dating an international woman or a woman from another country who is a commoner in her country but to me she is nothing less than a star. you have always been a star to me . you were my baby . my motivation my angel and my source of course .my ambition my pain my joy , my anguish and my everything . you were everything to me . I loved you , I loved a woman , a human.

I have not forgotten anything but sadly you have . out of sight out of mind. oh baby what have you done . why did you do this ? it still haunts me . I still wonder and I still think why ? what was my fault ? was my fault that I loved you and my fault is that I still love you . I loved you so much , and honestly I still love you so much from the bottom of my heart . you were never gone for me . you are always near to me , always close to my heart . close to me on the bed side. as close to me as I breathe air to live . and your love is a source of power which still drives me . you are my strength and you are my everything , my soul , my body .

Do you still remember anything baby ? do you ? or am I just another guy who came into your life ,lived with you shortly , gave you amount of time to enjoy and disappeared ? was my love a lie or fake to you ? was my love inadequate ? or I was physically unattractive baby ? tell me ?

May be I was not good enough for you . yes I know that you were taller to me . I know I was not a big guy you always wanted. I had not six pack abs or huge biceps or broad chest and I was not fair looking , yes I don’t have tons of money. but baby I had love for you and I had strength to fight for you with this world . and trust i can still fight and i am still fighting .I had desires and dreams for you and for our family . I always wanted a family . a small happy family , our small world , where you me and our two little children , one boy one girl to make a complete family and yes not to forget a cat and a dog to add. a car to drive around , to play a small play ground . I had planned all this . I created a world for us and was ready to build it but you destroyed it . seriously baby you destroyed our world.

If you think our love was a one time accident then you are wrong . that’s what you called it , an accident . it was not an accident baby . there are no accident , whatever happens in this universe happens for a reason . you also parted ways with me for a reason. and those reason were your own , not mine. you left me and I never did . I still love you the way I did 5 years ago . all those memories still fresh in my mind like yesterday , and a small flat where we lived became my fav . I still admire that small living room and a bed we slept together and that little kitchen where we cooked together . a small washroom for warm water to shower. a warm lamp right next to the couch and your small fish in the bowl. all that I still miss . I still remember all those moments . I love all and I missed all.

I love you honey , I really do , you made video for me on my birthday and you said that you will support me in whatever I do but unfortunately it was only words and when I decided to stand up for you , I am still keeping with it . I am still with you . I am still your supporter , still I think of you . even today I ask you how you doing ? even today I am your well wisher. even today my love for is still alive and trust me on this when I say that my love for you is here to stay . I have not forgotten you . you are still alive in my heart and in my mind . you are out of sight but not out of mind.

Have you forgotten the amount of time we invested on skype which helped us in building our relationship. have you forgotten that you used to wait for me for long ours and I used to wait for you and we used to run from the road to our living room coz we knew that someone is waiting for us on the other side of the computer . we both used to worry about each other . we used to shared pics and images and share videos , a dress new you purchased. you wanted to show me on cam how you looked in that new dress. you wanted to see my eyes behind my glasses and you and me we both used to think about each other even when we were away . those times we shared on skype when we knew that we are both 1000’s miles apart but love was blossoming . during that time we build our world and we build the foundation of our world  . we strengthen our emotions feelings for each other . it was lovely baby . we badly wanted to meet each other , badly wanted to kiss , wanted to make love , wanted to share those thoughts and those emotions. we were in love baby .

Don’t think I am not willing to come to you . I know you don’t love me anymore and you have no emotions . now here are two different people with two different approaches towards love . I still want to come to you , want to see you in blood and flesh . want to love you , want to kiss you , want to hold your hands. want to be with you . coz I love you . don’t think that I never tried. god know how many times I tried but it’s just so difficult to come to your country baby . what should I do ? tell me ? these people don’t understand love .

Honey I love you . I really do . if you think its a lie than you are wrong . plz don’t create joke out of me and of my emotions for you . I am not causing you any problems . I am just shocked. I have forgiven you baby and  I really have . but I am with you in your thick and thin. even when you are happy and when you are in pain , or you with someone or alone , you will find me with you always .

coz my love for you was not a lie , it never will .

I Love You.

-Dolce