Author: Dheeraj Gautam

writer,director,producer,sound designer,music mixer,editor,photographer,dancer. Dheeraj Gautam was born on 25th jan 1981,delhi india.his sunsign is aquarious.at the age of five dheeraj gautam showed an exceptional ability in freestyle break danceing.when he turned little younger he was influenced by the King Of Pop Michael Jackson.jackson had a great impact on his life.he adore his music and as a great human being and calls michael jackson his inspiration in music. Dheeraj is a natural born dancer with no official training in danceing.He has always been facinated by the world of movies and music and his dream is to win oscars. He did his masters in film and video production from london United Kingdom.his technical skills gives him an edge in video editing,sound design and electronic music composition.he made three short films in london which were applauded by people.his music has been listen by thousands and again he scores here. he is also an avid photographer. Dheeraj Gautam is gifted with vivid imagination and out of the box ideas and is always keen to portray it on screen with a difference. for Dheeraj Gautam's music mixcloud.com/​dheeraj7gautam soundcloud.com/​dheeraj-gautam he is also available on facebook facebook.com/​dheerajgautam to contact Dheeraj Gautam zipdrive007@hotmail.com

I don’t know dictionary , now !

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dictionary

I remember . yes I still remember . I think It was during high school when my father taught me how to use dictionary for the first time . I had seen him using this thick book during 1990’s often . I had seen him using it during conversation , lectures , debates or something similar . I remember I used to wonder what this thick book holds . what ever it is , it must be magical.

I was curious like any other kid during my teens and was eager to know what it was . I had not heard of word dictionary till then. then one day I asked my father . my father introduced me to this thick heavy book which he called dictionary . for the first time I held it in my hands , oh boy ! it was heavy . one big thick and heavy thing . he taught me how to use it and he taught what it holds. and I was fascinated . it was amazing . not only it was interesting to use it and but it was learning with fun .

I started using it often and I realized I had learnt a lot from it and it was magical . simply magical .now I was better in my class and in vocabulary and my English teacher was very happy with me . my father had kept that dictionary since his childhood and he asked me to keep it for my children. dictionary never expires , knowledge in it stays forever. I promised my father that yes I will keep this knowledge for future generations.

But today ! and this is 2018 , 23rd august 2018 , 3am to be precise . today its a different story all together. I am sorry father I did not keep my promise . not because I failed to use it but because this generation and future generation will not have any interest in this book . its so disheartening to see and makes me feel so bad about it that this book has lost it charm to nothing but one simple smartphone.

Today every one has a smartphone . no one wants to carry dictionary in their bags coz its heavy and its hassle to carry coz of its weight and size. now people have downloaded dictionaries in their phone which cost only few mega bytes. that’s it . carry everything in your smartphone . I too have started using it in my smartphone and I do not even look at this gift from my father which he got from his father . I have lost the skill of using it. I or we have lost so many skills in time to technology and we did not even realize it .

Technology has helped us a lot but it has come for cost . it has made us insensitive to small things which holds big importance . we have become less emotional and do not regard anything now . consider this , ever since people have started using WhatsApp they do not call , one simple free of cost text . since there is no call there is no connection which one can feel from voice. how WhatsApp has ruined our lives I will cover in next article.

But here our all time fav old friend dictionary which helped us a lot during our school days and can help today and tomorrow has lost its charm to technology. I am not against technology but I am against insensitivities . I wonder now and I am scared what will happen when robots will take over humans . will human loose emotions to each other ?well , we already have . it has already been started . and this is scary .

Its very difficult to keep love alive for someone who do not even loves you anymore. well I am the exception and doing the unthinkable . I am the living live example of how to love some one who do not loves you and funny thing is that she knows it and yet no answer. I am like dictionary . sitting in the corner but once I had importance to someone and now I am obsolete to same person.

— dolce

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I come alone

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Its been five years . yes you read it correct , 5 . its a long time . very long . in a number its only 5 but to me its a long time . in these five years the world has change significantly . I have changed , you have changed. I was supposed to visit you every single year , every single Christmas , every single new year and every single birthdays . every year I think that I will visit you this year . will celebrate your birthday with you. or Christmas with you or new year with you . but every year its a same story. I just cant come by .

I love you and I love your country , your people and your language and your culture , its my second home . I may have left you but I still breathe in the same air . it feels like the same fragrance . the smell of your skin is still there with me .  I can still tell you how the breath of you feels like , I can feel your touch . your kiss and the feeling of me deep in you . making love to you with passion. those French kisses we had , those troubled sessions we had . those fights and confusions and adventure . I miss all that baby . do you ?

its been 5 years since I have last visited you and 8 years when I kissed you last . it was way back in 2011. but it all still feels the same . feels like it was yesterday .

I don’t cry baby , I don’t cry anymore . I am fine but I love you . what I can do . I love you . I just love you . and trust me I will die one day . but yes the love and emotions and the moments we had together will remain.

you are such a lovely woman and I was so lucky . and I was so happy and my family was also so happy , but I don’t know what happened , I forgive you baby . I really do .

I want to kiss you now and I want to hold you in my arms again , I don’t know if this will happen or not but its like a distant dream . you allowed me to kiss you and to make love to you . I touched your body , your skin , your lips and caress your hair and stroked you with passion. the sound of your love can be heard again. coz I want to .

I want to come to you again baby . trust me every single year I want to come to you . give me a chance I will stay with you forever . I will love you trust me , our little baby and a lovely dog and a cat and little sweet home . our small world full of passion and joy and happiness and smile and love . I dream of this world . don’t you baby ?

you do , I know you do . you are no stone ,you are my baby .

every time I see a plane in the sky . I think of you . I think that I am in this plane going to my baby . I am going to visit her , will meet her , will see her again , will hold her hands again and kiss her again. she is so lovely . how can I live my life without you my lady . I just can’t .

I will come to you my girl. I just cant say when , right now . but I will for sure. you can count on me . may be dolce is busy with something important . if dolce is not visiting you then it has to be something important , but nothing is more important to me than you my baby .

I love you so as I come alone .

Dolces

The wedding Ring which I never gave you

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Yes this is true . remember the day we met in September 2013 . its been four long years . but its still with me . this is what I was carrying in my pocket . I had this hiding in my pocket and I never told you about it in advance . I wanted to give this to you on the day of our meeting after 2 long years . I was kind of foolish who had hopes that you will accept my ring but I think I was right by not giving it to you . it was not the right time and not the right occasion . you were with someone else . you loved another man after me . there was someone else in your life. and I was aware about it .

I don’t know why I purchased this . I don’t know what I was thinking . I think I was confident that you will come to me , was confident that once you will see me you will change , I was positive that once we will meet things will turn good . I think this much how I pride our love and our sacrifices for each other.  the pain and the joy we went through together , the time we had spent with each other from 5000 km distance , every single day did not go by thinking about each other and when we both managed to had time for each other even when we knew there is a time difference . that was incredible . those days were amazing . can’t be forgotten . can’t fade from my memory . at least !

That day , I don’t remember the day but it was September 2013 . and I remember the café we met coz I had some fond memories of that café back in dec 2011 . it’s one of my fav place to visit. and I will visit again soon . I was very nervous that day . I was tensed and I had no idea how you will react to see me . coz I knew you never wanted me to visit you . I knew that you do not love me anymore . had no emotions , had no feelings. but I do not know why I had hopes that things can still change for good . I was with my friend that day , I asked her to drop me to the café. we travelled by train to reach there . I was nervous and tensed , she realized this and said , you be fine . don’t worry .

Once off the train she showed me the path way or street which leads to café. once I was there I knew my destination coz I had visited this place earlier and had good memories but I was still very nervous coz of your unpredictable nature. so I entered I gave my jacket at the counter and asked a woman that I had a friend who is waiting for me here . she pointed out in right hand direction from the stairs , I started coming down but I guess you had already heard my voice and here you were . you were there right in front of me . right there . you came for me and you hugged me . it was the moment when I felt like time stopped . I realized , this is the woman I fought so much for , with people , with government . all for what ? only for my love for her. I had given you my promise that I will fight this world for you . I still live this promise .

You hugged me . that was the warm hug I waited so long for . it was a moment which came after a long wait . all this fight which I fought in last 2 years was to have a moment of hug which did not even last for 5 sec and a meeting which last not more then 2 hours. but I think it was a fight worth fought . I had earned my moment with you . and here I was with you . it was my time . I had earned that time . yes you were unhappy to see me , you were angry . but I guess I had win coz you were there for me without your desires .I had pushed you to come and meet me and I still remember the text you had sent a day before saying that meeting is not a good idea so lets not meet but I being assertive wanted to meet and you had surrendered.

Its not about win or loose its about who honesty and loyalty and I think I scored on this well . coz I was loyal I was honest and trust me on this I am still the same .

I had this ring with me in my pocket which I had for you . I had plans to give it to you . but I knew I will not give it to you coz you will not accept it . I never gave it to you coz I still loved you and wanted to marry you . wanted to have kids and I wanted you to be my wife and mother of my babies , a dream which we had cherished for so long. I wanted to marry you . you were my baby. my love . but there was someone else in your life , some other man better than me I guess . you were also never the best for me . and you never will . no one is perfect . no one ever will. we all compromise somewhere or the other . and we both did, out of emotions , out of love we had for each other.

I had honest time with you that day , listening to you was the only thing I ever wanted. a lot had happened in your life after you left me . your brother got married and I was not invited , its ok . you had a car now a good job and you looked so lovely and charming ,just like good old days . you were still so young and beautiful . I wanted to say I love you , wanted to give that ring to you . but I knew this ring will remain in my pocket. so I kept it very close to my heart. conversation was over . it started formal but spending two hours with you I guess had some emotions in your heart for me so you were little close and then very close . I think it was the strength of my love for you. may be an unseen force. and I am sorry baby you paid for tea that day . I had my credit card with me but if you remember the console did not work and you had to pay cash , it was bad , I was not happy .

So we left holding hands just like old days, and I wondered love is the biggest force in the universe after time . I guess you honored the fact that we had honest and pure love for each other ,irrespective of being from different countries and had different languages and cultures . I think it was amazing .

I dropped you to your car. and I knew this is it , the time has come to part ways , those 2 hour or so were felt like 2 years passed by . I had waited patiently so long for this and it has come to an end. and I remember two hours ago you were not ready to kiss me but two hours later you kissed me . that was the power of love .

That day time had stopped for me and when I said good bye to you and saw your car going far and far from me I knew this day might not come again . but as always a fighter never gives up and fights till the end . and with hopes high I left , walking down the street back to the train station I came from.

Hiding the ring in my pocket which was meant for you and will always be yours.

I will always love you even when you are not young and beautiful , right now I am on a rescue mission , once this is over I will create my moment again , I will come back to you .

You know me .

-Dolce

7 days a week but Why ?

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I am writing this post coz I got inspired from somewhere . not going to tell you from where , do the hard part all by yourself .

An inspiration is a inspiration . there is not substitute to it and it does not matter where it comes from but when it does , it gets the job done.

I speak my mind in this blog . this is my blog and I write it and whatever I write yes its for you to read . agree or disagree at your own peril 🙂

I might not be the best in speaking English , I might not be the best in writing English but I still get the job done . like have you ever listen to a song in a different language , a language which you do not understand but you still enjoy the music . why is that ? it’s coz you still get the message which is “kindly listen to the music and do not try to understand what it says “.

Understood ?

sorry I speak my mind 🙂

Alright so coming on to the subject . see we take our years months weeks and days for granted . we know its there . coz its there every year . our time is limited here and we know its here for us but we take it for granted , we know we will always have tomorrow to get the job done . coz we know there is always tomorrow . we take so many things for granted coz its just there for us not realizing its true value .

But if you understand the value of every single little thing in your life it’s importance increase and we starts caring for it . most of the time its small things which actually makes huge difference in our lives.

Similar to this every single day of our weeks holds an importance , every single month has its importance and every year is important to us . coz every bit of it is taking us closer to either happiness or sorrow . it’s on to us what we choose to do with it and how we use it . as our actions today decides our tomorrow coz there is always tomorrow .

ever wondered

Why there are only 7 days in a week ?

why there are 12 months in a year ?

why our year is of 365 days ?

why a day has 24 hours ?

Looking for answers to these questions is very easy , simply google it or watch tons of you tube videos . its all there . this is age of knowledge and internet . its all digital . you do not have to go to classes or looking for someone to search for answers . it all available on your desktop , laptops or smartphones.

But understanding is the tough part .

Every single day in every culture and religion holds an importance.

I am number 7 and there are 7 days in a week . it’s a reason enough for me to smile .

See it’s not that tough to smile after all 🙂

—-Dolce

Another new year , and !

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resolutions

Yes this is yet another new year and this is 2018 , 2017 gone and now its time for 2018 . we know what we did in 2017 and what we did not do in 2017 , what we could not achieve in 2017 we will try for it in 2018 , same old resolutions which we planned in 2015 and tried to execute in 2016 but could not complete it and tried again 2017 with rush but half way down we lost steam and again its another new year and another resolution and another target to achieve and yet another dud .

Its the story with millions of us , we all are very encouraged in the beginning and as the year passes we start losing interest and hope and everything seems the same again as it was last year, reality of life is harsh but what’s even more harsh is our approach to our resolutions .

The best way to deal with this is make no resolution . and keep things simple . coz if its not simple then its complicated . take one day at a time and it will all fall in place . if we set one big target to achieve , its will always look big until we drop it down to small  ones and try to reach our goal one step at a time . its always simple to break your aim in small and approach it one at a time and of course set realistic targets . not like I will fly to the moon .

I have seen many people even in my friend circle , or office , co workers or relatives , being over weight is a very common issue to most of us . every year we set up a target to loose weight or to get in shape or to make muscles . in my office I have found many men or women who always talk about how to get into shape or what to eat what not to eat , what is right or what is wrong for body . they have the knowledge and they what needs to be done but unfortunately they are one with weight gain issues or they look like just about any common man or woman over weight . so what’s the point of this conversation coz its not taking you anywhere . you are just sitting on your asses and doing nothing but blabbering and it makes no different . having knowledge and doing nothing with it is more dangerous than having no knowledge at all .

so get out leave the comfort of your home and get the job done .

That’s the only way to do it .

Have a good year .

Dolce

Your Love was a LIE ?

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Emotional Sad Love shayari for X girlfriend in hindi

I don’t know why but your love was a lie.

I cherish the memories deep in my heart. I still have those pics and videos and I see your pics or ours or I see those videos we created out of no where . when we deeply in love. those moments we shared together , those times when we cooked together. those days we lived together. we drove around and we saw a movie in Russian . I remember how we went to this cinema hall somewhere in the city center and I knew that it will be dubbed in Russian but I was ok with it coz language was a never a border to me.

To me love sees no boundaries . just like music knows no language . I never came to you seeing I will be dating an international woman or a woman from another country who is a commoner in her country but to me she is nothing less than a star. you have always been a star to me . you were my baby . my motivation my angel and my source of course .my ambition my pain my joy , my anguish and my everything . you were everything to me . I loved you , I loved a woman , a human.

I have not forgotten anything but sadly you have . out of sight out of mind. oh baby what have you done . why did you do this ? it still haunts me . I still wonder and I still think why ? what was my fault ? was my fault that I loved you and my fault is that I still love you . I loved you so much , and honestly I still love you so much from the bottom of my heart . you were never gone for me . you are always near to me , always close to my heart . close to me on the bed side. as close to me as I breathe air to live . and your love is a source of power which still drives me . you are my strength and you are my everything , my soul , my body .

Do you still remember anything baby ? do you ? or am I just another guy who came into your life ,lived with you shortly , gave you amount of time to enjoy and disappeared ? was my love a lie or fake to you ? was my love inadequate ? or I was physically unattractive baby ? tell me ?

May be I was not good enough for you . yes I know that you were taller to me . I know I was not a big guy you always wanted. I had not six pack abs or huge biceps or broad chest and I was not fair looking , yes I don’t have tons of money. but baby I had love for you and I had strength to fight for you with this world . and trust i can still fight and i am still fighting .I had desires and dreams for you and for our family . I always wanted a family . a small happy family , our small world , where you me and our two little children , one boy one girl to make a complete family and yes not to forget a cat and a dog to add. a car to drive around , to play a small play ground . I had planned all this . I created a world for us and was ready to build it but you destroyed it . seriously baby you destroyed our world.

If you think our love was a one time accident then you are wrong . that’s what you called it , an accident . it was not an accident baby . there are no accident , whatever happens in this universe happens for a reason . you also parted ways with me for a reason. and those reason were your own , not mine. you left me and I never did . I still love you the way I did 5 years ago . all those memories still fresh in my mind like yesterday , and a small flat where we lived became my fav . I still admire that small living room and a bed we slept together and that little kitchen where we cooked together . a small washroom for warm water to shower. a warm lamp right next to the couch and your small fish in the bowl. all that I still miss . I still remember all those moments . I love all and I missed all.

I love you honey , I really do , you made video for me on my birthday and you said that you will support me in whatever I do but unfortunately it was only words and when I decided to stand up for you , I am still keeping with it . I am still with you . I am still your supporter , still I think of you . even today I ask you how you doing ? even today I am your well wisher. even today my love for is still alive and trust me on this when I say that my love for you is here to stay . I have not forgotten you . you are still alive in my heart and in my mind . you are out of sight but not out of mind.

Have you forgotten the amount of time we invested on skype which helped us in building our relationship. have you forgotten that you used to wait for me for long ours and I used to wait for you and we used to run from the road to our living room coz we knew that someone is waiting for us on the other side of the computer . we both used to worry about each other . we used to shared pics and images and share videos , a dress new you purchased. you wanted to show me on cam how you looked in that new dress. you wanted to see my eyes behind my glasses and you and me we both used to think about each other even when we were away . those times we shared on skype when we knew that we are both 1000’s miles apart but love was blossoming . during that time we build our world and we build the foundation of our world  . we strengthen our emotions feelings for each other . it was lovely baby . we badly wanted to meet each other , badly wanted to kiss , wanted to make love , wanted to share those thoughts and those emotions. we were in love baby .

Don’t think I am not willing to come to you . I know you don’t love me anymore and you have no emotions . now here are two different people with two different approaches towards love . I still want to come to you , want to see you in blood and flesh . want to love you , want to kiss you , want to hold your hands. want to be with you . coz I love you . don’t think that I never tried. god know how many times I tried but it’s just so difficult to come to your country baby . what should I do ? tell me ? these people don’t understand love .

Honey I love you . I really do . if you think its a lie than you are wrong . plz don’t create joke out of me and of my emotions for you . I am not causing you any problems . I am just shocked. I have forgiven you baby and  I really have . but I am with you in your thick and thin. even when you are happy and when you are in pain , or you with someone or alone , you will find me with you always .

coz my love for you was not a lie , it never will .

I Love You.

-Dolce

Heavens Tail

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Some days ago when I was on my rooftop. My beloved rooftop I saw this in the sky. Looked like a rocket contrails to me but I soon realised it’s a tail of a big dinosaur. 

It looked one and one time I thought of godzilla. Oh yes it wasn’t so. It was clouds in the formation of tail. It looked awesome and my habit to capture anything goodi find captivating. So I captured it and I loved It. So I share it here. 

Trick loads to come. 

– dolce.